Boredom and Wisdom
For the past 16 days, I have been the parent in charge at home, every day, all day long, with my two elementary age boys. We did not go on any vacation, having spent our vacation budget on a trip to Atlanta over November. We were, in a word, stuck at home. Stuck. At. Home.
We did, however, engage in a wide range of activities, both at home and away. Indoor play spaces, building ginger bread houses, bowling, numerous games of strategy and chance, books, lots of movies. At the beginning of the holiday I drew up a list of activities for us to do and solicited further suggestions from the boys. Aside from these excursions, with the cold weather, we were mostly confined inside. We were lucky enough to score warm-enough weather for two walks.
Nonetheless, we were all faced with a substantial amount of boredom and the frustration that comes with boredom. Being stuck at home, and maybe not being so good at building a nearby social network, there were only so many things we could think of to do. At bottom boredom is just no fun, and even a bit stressful.
During this time, I've been thinking over the value of boredom, well, since I've had time for it. It seemed like I had plenty of time to be bored, but not enough time to take on anything of new of significant size. I have come to think the value of boredom is quite underestimated for people of any age.
First, great creativity comes out of boredom. Once you get past the anger and the frustration, what boredom offers is the opportunity to come up with something new. I've seen my kids invent countless new games, often lasting for hours. Almost always these new creations come after a period of boredom. It's as if the emptiness has to form a completeness before something new can come forth. If we had the TV on all of the time, these games would certainly not emerge.
But perhaps even more important is learning the ability to sit with boredom. Or fidget with boredom. But at any rate to deal with boredom and realize that it is not a crisis. That we are not in any kind of lasting way harmed by the frustration that comes with boredom.
Because once you have learned to live with boredom, you no longer have to fear it. You no longer have to seek something to fill every waking minute with distraction or entertainment. You can let things sit. You can allow things to arise. Once the frustration and anxiety of your boredom is passed, you may find new voices welling up from within you, voices you had not paid attention to during your previous spate of activity. You may come to know yourself better.
Living with boredom may be the first step, however small, towards a greater wisdom. I have come to think so.
We did, however, engage in a wide range of activities, both at home and away. Indoor play spaces, building ginger bread houses, bowling, numerous games of strategy and chance, books, lots of movies. At the beginning of the holiday I drew up a list of activities for us to do and solicited further suggestions from the boys. Aside from these excursions, with the cold weather, we were mostly confined inside. We were lucky enough to score warm-enough weather for two walks.
Nonetheless, we were all faced with a substantial amount of boredom and the frustration that comes with boredom. Being stuck at home, and maybe not being so good at building a nearby social network, there were only so many things we could think of to do. At bottom boredom is just no fun, and even a bit stressful.
During this time, I've been thinking over the value of boredom, well, since I've had time for it. It seemed like I had plenty of time to be bored, but not enough time to take on anything of new of significant size. I have come to think the value of boredom is quite underestimated for people of any age.
First, great creativity comes out of boredom. Once you get past the anger and the frustration, what boredom offers is the opportunity to come up with something new. I've seen my kids invent countless new games, often lasting for hours. Almost always these new creations come after a period of boredom. It's as if the emptiness has to form a completeness before something new can come forth. If we had the TV on all of the time, these games would certainly not emerge.
But perhaps even more important is learning the ability to sit with boredom. Or fidget with boredom. But at any rate to deal with boredom and realize that it is not a crisis. That we are not in any kind of lasting way harmed by the frustration that comes with boredom.
Because once you have learned to live with boredom, you no longer have to fear it. You no longer have to seek something to fill every waking minute with distraction or entertainment. You can let things sit. You can allow things to arise. Once the frustration and anxiety of your boredom is passed, you may find new voices welling up from within you, voices you had not paid attention to during your previous spate of activity. You may come to know yourself better.
Living with boredom may be the first step, however small, towards a greater wisdom. I have come to think so.
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